Looks Like I Need To Add Ireland To My To Do List.

If I can't make it to Munich for Octoberfest, then Dublin is an acceptable alternative. No autobahn though and they drive on the wrong side of the road. I'm pretty sure I can learn to shift with my left hand though.

You Belong in Dublin

Friendly and down to earth, you want to enjoy Europe without snobbery or pretensions. You're the perfect person to go wild on a pub crawl... or enjoy a quiet bike ride through the old part of town.

What European City Do You Belong In?

Quote Of The Night.

You get to vote.

"Dad your hooker is here."

Or

"She's 18. It's legal."
"Hey that sounds like a great campaign slogan." *pulls out photo with that slogan*

Dear DSL Service Provider

Dear Ameritech/SBC/AT&T/Supermerged Phone Company,

Is it so incredibly difficult to provide a service I pay for? I realize that sometimes service goes down, but being up for 6 minutes in a 24 hour period I feel is unacceptable. If I was merely surfing the web for my own amusement it wouldn't be so bad. When I'm attempting to upload several cover letters and resumes that is a problem. Sadly for these particular jobs I only have an email address as contact information. Ah the advantages of 21st Century society, why have a snail mail address as backup?

Signed,
Disgruntled Internet Customer

We Have Contact!

Something odd occurred today besides the fire in the bathroom that evacuated us. I received two emails from two places I sent my cover letter and resume to. This wasn't the standard email auto-acknowledgement of receiving my resume. An actual human being sent an email to ask some specific question(s).

I'm not saying this is "Mission Accomplished," but at least I have a nibble on the hook for the first time.

This Is Why They Play The Games.

11 seed George Mason is in the Final Four.

11 seed George Mason is in the Final Four???

11 SEED GEORGE MASON IS IN THE FINAL FOUR?!?!?!

I knew not every #1 makes it to the Final Four, but no a single one made it this year. How many brackets look like someone slit their wrist over it this year.

Let's look at the rest of the Final Four.

3 seeded Florida made it. A definite long shot, but if you picked them not an unreasonable choice.

4 seeded Louisiana State University...ummm..wow. Seriously I doubt anyone picked them to be in the Final Four. With Duke, Texas, and Iowa in that bracket LSU played some serious games to earn their way into the Final Four.

2 seeded UCLA defeats 1 seed Memphis 50 - 45. Wait that wasn't the halftime score? The high school state championship scored more points than that and high school doesn't use a shot clock! I don't like UCLA, but they were a good pick if you had them.

Should be an interesting last few games. Does anyone have a bracket that is salvageable?

The Knowledge Seeker.

I needed out of the house. My brain was tired from writing cover letter/emails. A ubiquitous Starbucks is just down the road. If a chocolate mocha can't perk me up nothing would. I brought my latest book (something on foreclosures as I never read for fun anymore), the latest Indianapolis Monthly, and a few sections of the Sunday paper I hadn't quite gotten to yet.

The chair was comfy as I watched a business news channel on the large screen TV. The sound was off, but closed captioning was on. The story on how large SUVs were selling well was quite interesting. A girl (Any female under 25 now seems like a girl to me now. Geez I really am turning into the old man.) with a Starbucks uniform was discussing with someone on her phone how difficult the material she was studying was. I could see the thick book on her table, but it was open so I couldn't make out the title.

I continued reading and an on-duty employee asked her how she was doing with her studying. She said it was difficult and things were confusing. When she looked at the answers she had wrong the book didn't explain the correct answer very well. Again I couldn't tell what she was studying. After some time I turned around and simply asked her. The young woman, age 19 or 20, was studying for her GED.

The thick book was a series of practice tests, examples, and explanations. It reminded me of the MBE books I had last summer. She was working on editing sentences. I'll agree some of the practice questions were vague. I spent the next half hour or so assisting her with the questions she missed and trying to explain why the correct answers were indeed correct. I explained that standardized exams like the GED (or Boards, the LSAT, GRE, MCAT, SAT, and the Bar Exam) were as much an endurance race as they were something to test your knowledge. Some sections she would do well on and some she wouldn't. I hoped her editing skills would improve, but she could earn points on other sections as well.

She had pride in her work. If she got a wrong answer she wanted to know why she got it wrong. She dropped out before graduating high school. She and other kids like her thought school was a place to socialize, not learn. She was embarrassed when she didn't understand something and didn't want others to see she couldn't do a problem. It was a self-fulfilling problem. Fall behind and you can't catch up after awhile. Her mother didn't provide reinforcement for her education when she lived at home. The few people that tried to help her she refused to listen to. This one woman was a microcosm of everything I've seen these past few months in substitute teaching: the dark side of high school. Yet now she wanted to be more than what she was. She wanted to get her GED so she could go to college for interior design.

I hope she gets what she wants. I hoped I helped her a little bit.

Open The Pod Bay Doors Hal.

You Should Be a Science Fiction Writer

Your ideas are very strange, and people often wonder what planet you're from. And while you may have some problems being "normal," you'll have no problems writing sci-fi. Whether it's epic films, important novels, or vivid comics... Your own little universe could leave an important mark on the world!

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

Damn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta

I know it isn't Robin's favorite movie, but I have the song stuck in my head.

I'm Willing To Be Flexible, But...

My teaching duties are varied. In essence I do whatever is required of me to do the job. I'm fine with that since it makes for some interesting experiences. However, what happens if the mixed up wiring in my brain gets confused for a second?

Yesterday I had library duty. My favorite job actually. One teacher took his class to the computer lab in the back. About 15 minutes later one of the librarians came up to the front desk. I SWEAR this is what I heard, "Could you assist that teacher in the bathroom please?"

WHAT!!! Whoa I'm not helping anyone go to the bathroom. I'm not a medical person and the teacher looked pretty healthy to me. He should be able to pee on his own.

She meant, "Could you cover his class for a minute so he could go to the bathroom?" Whew!!! Okay that I can do. You had me worried for a minute.

How Can Sitting In Front Of A Computer Be So Tiring?

Search online job boards. Click mouse. Upload resume. Click mouse. Submit resume to specific ad. Click mouse. Look at potential employer's website to see who they are. Click mouse.

Why is my brain more exhausted than my index finger?

What Would The World Be Like If More Lawyers Were Like Denny Crane?

"I take the stairs every morning. Elevators are for Democrats!"

"I don't understand why people don't use violence to solve their problems. It works every time."

I don't know if you want to cook wih Alan Shore. "Don't eat the pink parts. They cause vomiting or death."

Of course Alan's negotiation skills are excellent. Send in some thugs to bind the evil weasel and force him to sign some papers. I didn't learn that in my mediation class. I'll keep that in mind for the future.

Linda Carter Needs A Cameo In The Whedonverse.

Buffy The Vampire Slayer/Angel/Firefly creator Joss Whedon is writing a movie script for Wonder Woman.

"I'm probably going to turn it in in a few days," Whedon said of his Wonder Woman script. "It's coming along. ... There will be all of the expected stuff. Of course there will be the bracelets; there will be the invisible jet, the lasso, all of that.

"Whedon likened the character to another one of his creations, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, adding: "It's about girls maturing, a rite of passage, that kind of thing."

Ummm...superhero movies are hit or miss. You get great ones (Superman, Batman, X-Men, Spiderman, Batman Begins), decent ones (X-Men 2, DareDevil), and those that suck (Incredible Hulk, Supergirl, Electra, Catwoman, The Punisher [both of them]). Notice all the female hero movies suck so far. They sucked because of horrible scripts. However if someone can write a good script for a female superhero movie it is Joss Wheedon [see Buffy].

No casting news yet, but who could play Wonder Woman? Depending on how old WW is supposed to be in the movie Buffy alums Sarah Michelle Gellar and Alyson Hannigan might be too old. Summer Glau in Serenity proved she can kick ass, but I have difficulty seeing her in the costume. You could always go with an unknown like they did for Batman Begins.

Happy Spring!!!

After a mild winter with little snow, today is the first day of spring. For tonight we get the start of 5 to 8 inches of snow. WTF!?!?!

Second Best Comic Ever

A Bit Of Both You are 60% Calvin and 40% Hobbes

Calvin & Hobbes, like a scruffy yin and yang, are in perfect balance within you. Like Calvin, you're weird, a bit insecure, and can be a trouble-maker. But like Hobbes, you're down to earth and sensitive. It's a risk to say it here, after just a ten question test, but I'll bet you're smarter than most. Both Calvin and Hobbes are crafty, clever characters, and any one made from equal parts of each is a force to be reckoned with.

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 62% on calvin You scored higher than 18% on hobbes

Link: The Calvin Or Hobbes Test written by gwendolynbooks on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

"You're the lawyer, you write up the contract!"

Item being sold. Check!
Identify the buyer and seller. Check!
Blank line for the purchase price to be filled in later. Check!
Terms for the installment plan of payment. Check!
A choice of law and forum clause favorable to me since I'm only licensed in Indiana. Check! (Yeah I'm showing off a little. I need to prove I actually went to law school.)
Date. Check!
Blank lines for our signatures. Check!

My first contract. It isn't even a half page long. While simple it should be legally binding. As long as I pay off the full purchase price in 3 years I don't see any need for anyone to file a breach of contract claim against me. The CAG would kill me if I don't pay her. She knows how to make it impossible for CSI to tell I was murdered.

Friday Quote

"Thin air? Why is it always thin air? Never fat air, chubby air, mostly-fit-could-stand-lose-a-few-pounds air?"
Michael Garibaldi, Grey 17 is Missing

How Green Are You?

I thought this was a St. Patrick's Day test. Nope it is more philosophical. Speaking of St. Patrick's Day I decided to wear a green sweater (emerald green no less) to be safe from pinching. If you decide to pinch me with your fake Irishness I'll revert back to Germanic heritage to punch and subjugate you for the next several weeks. That'll teach you!

You Are Emerald Green

Deep and mysterious, it often seems like no one truly gets you. Inside, you are very emotional and moody - though you don't let it show. People usually have a strong reaction to you... profound love or deep hate. But you can even get those who hate you to come around. There's something naturally harmonious about you.

What Color Green Are You?

I Love Happy Endings.

In 1978, LeRoy McCoy bought a 1968 Chevy Camaro to restore. That same year LeRoy had a son Anthony. Over the next 20 years father and son lovingly restored the classic musclecar. In 1998, while going to a Tennessee car show LeRoy suffered a fatal heart attack. Mrs. McCoy sold the classic car in order to pay for the funeral.

All these years later, Anthony found his father's car on eBay. Anthony went to Ohio to confirm it was the correct vehicle. He submitted the winning bid.

I'm sure dad would be proud.

Wouldn't You Like To Be A Pepper Too?

I don't dislike Dr. Pepper, but I rarely drink it. It is certainly not Pepsi, the nectar of the gods. Courtesy of Legal Quandary.

You Are Dr. Pepper

You're very unique and funky, yet you still have a bit of traditionalism to you. People who like you think they have great taste... and they usually do. Your best soda match: Root Beer Stay away from: 7 Up

What Kind of Soda Are You?

I Can Still Hear Jegen Bellowing.

I just finished my taxes. Okay TurboTax finished doing my taxes, but I inputted the data. I forget the exact figure, but did you know if you earn less than $7,500 you don't have to file your tax return. I don't recommend that, you don't get your refund if you don't file your taxes.

I clicked on various extra information simply to be amused and to learn things. I didn't perform a 1031 Like-Kind Exchange, but Jegen's voice appeared in my head as I read about eligible property must be either investment or business related, not personal. Don't forget, "EVERYTHING is gross income!"

If anything, thanks to his class I understand the tax code a bit better now. No I will not be your tax attorney.

The best thing is I finished in time to catch the new Veronica Mars episode.

At Least They'll Spot The Problem.

I didn't get to the most important items on my To Do List, but I did get quite a bit finished yesterday. The association is having a spring walk-through to see what needs to be fixed today. I left a voicemail stating who I was, where I was, and what needed to be repaired this year. The soffit above my bedroom window is falling down. My shed is full of decaying wood, the door is in multiple pieces, and the sill has rotted away. The most obvious problem, if they're willing to walk to the muddy back, is the fence that fell over. I gave up trying to put the fence back up the past few weeks. With the wind gusts the fence keeps falling down. Only cats walk along the back path as no sidewalk exists. The fact the leaf cleaning crew keeps forgetting to get the fallen leaves for the fourth year in a row makes it impassable.

I was quite pleasant in my voicemail. Please note these problems and fix them in a reasonable time.

What If My Life Was Like 24?

The following takes place between 4:00 am and 5:00 am.

"ZZZZZZZZZ" *Tosses and turns in bed.* "ZZZZZZZZZZ"

I admit it, Jack Bauer leads a far more exciting life than I do.

Time To Start The Campaign Tour

I knew all those episodes of The West Wing would come in handy. Hail To The Chief will be replaced with The Imperial March.

President You scored 64% Campaigning, 77% Personality, and 78% Effectiveness!

After serving as a Senator for many terms you decide that its time you threw your hat into the ring to become President. After a bloody and vicious campaign you win the primaries by a tiny margain. In the national elections you are lucky in the fact that your competitor is easily misunderstood and hated by the press, you beat him by a small margain. As President you are noted for your hardwork and effective foreign policy, although sometimes those in charge of your image sabotage you. Despite this you are remembered as a liked and effective Executive.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 38% on Campaigning You scored higher than 75% on Personality You scored higher than 88% on Effectiveness

Link: The achievable political office Test

Bracketology 101 For 2006.

The key to good bracket is very simple in theory: where are the upsets in the first two rounds? Once you figure out the upsets the rest falls in line pretty easily.

First Round is always key.
#1s don't lose to #16s.
Usually one #2 will fall to the #15. You can almost guarantee that. Almost.
Usually a #3 and #4 will fall to a #14 and #13 respectively. But you have feel that a bit. I'm not shocked when a #4 loses. A #3 falling in the first round is somewhat rare.
#5s vs. #12s. These are the tough ones. One #5 will fall and sometimes two #5s will fall. Never three of them though. Syracuse/Texas A&M and Pitt/Kent State look interesting to me.
#6 over #11. Just go for the #6 seed unless you see a very interesting matchup.
#7 over #10. Again unless you see a very interesting matchup go for the higher seed.
#8 seeds and #9 seeds. BAH! Just flip a coin.

Second Round
All those low seeds that just pulled off a major upset had their day in the sun. Pick the higher seed.
The second round is a good place to have a #1 fall.

After that you're dealing with teams in the Sweet Sixteen. At that point you just pick high seeds unless you see something very interesting. Once you get to the Final Four you'll likely have two #1s, a #2, and a #3. At that point anything goes. Have fun!

What Is That Bright Light In The Sky?

After 20 days and 20 nights of rain and thunderstorms the miserable gray clouds have broken. A bright light is revealed in the sky. I don't know what it is, but I'm opening up the windows and letting in somewhat warm air.

Running Backs Are The Easiest To Replace.

He went for the money. Though Edge has gone to the Arizona Cardinals, I'm not distressed by this. Running backs are the easiest position to draft for. The Broncos proved as long as you had a good line you could plug any good runner in the backfield and get results.

Personally I don't believe any professional athlete should have a salary of more then $2 million a year. The savings should be passed back to the average fan so he can afford to go the games in the first place.

*I'll discuss the road trip later. No time for now.

A Little Bit Of Munich In Kentucky.

This sounds like one extremely cool place. Could the Hofbrauhaus be even better than the Rathskellar? I'll let you know in a few days.

Friday Quote

"You see. It's like I've always said. You can get more with a kind word and a 2 by 4 than you can with just a kind word."
- Marcus Cole

You're Going To Stick That Where?

Going to the dentist is like getting an oil change. You want to be in and out of the office as fast as possible. It falls under the category of necessary evil. The staff is always nice and pleasant, but does anyone enjoy going to the dentist?

I knew what work was going to be performed. I hoped the cotton swab of topical ointment was all the numbing I required. Nope it was the pre-number. Doc came out with a harpoon that could take out Moby Dick. Going quail hunting with the vice-president seemed like a better idea. I was smart and just closed my eyes. You know what, I barely felt a thing.

In 5 minutes the left side of my face was on the floor. I felt like the rubber guy from Fantastic Four. Last time I had the procedure I don't recall them even offering to numb me up. This time was a far better experience.

You Want The Job Hunt To Be Perfect.

The idea was to type up and send out 5 or 6 cover letters and resumes. I managed to finish one (long story that I'm not getting into. You would think doing laundry would be easy, but OH NO!). I decide to use the superduper laser printer to make the addresses on my one envelope. Word's printer wizard showed me exactly what I had to do.

Being a SMART computer person I decide to test this on regular envelopes instead of the expensive blue marbled resume envelopes I got the other week. I actually use old resume envelopes that don't match any resume paper I have as I don't have any regular cheap white envelopes. The envelope never gets a address printed on it. I ran it through 5 or 6 times and never got any address to print on it. I even told Word what size envelope I had (no. 10 in case you're curious). It didn't matter. The printer did like to keep the print queue full and use up my paper. I had 4 sheets of paper with mailing addresses on them come out. How useless!!!

Resigned I decided to print the addresses on the envelope. It doesn't look as professional, but it is all I can do. I manually cleared out the printer queue. The printer was ready. I put in one piece of the expensive blue marbled resume paper and hit PRINT on the window that had my resume. My resume didn't print out, but the mailing address looked nice on the marble paper.

Someone please just shoot me now.

To add insult to injury I just discovered the glue on the envelopes is useless. Not only does it taste horrible, but the flap will not stay down. Plan B was to tape it down, which I did. Does ANYTHING in my life work the way it is supposed to?

Tornado Test Today.

Just a friendly public service announcement. Tornado sirens throughout the state will be tested twice today. If you hear sirens at 10:10am and sometime after 7pm please think about your bad weather plan. If your plan consists only of kissing your sweat ass behind I suggest add more safety elements to keep you alive.

At least my students yesterday did a good job with their tornado drill. I was surprised they were quiet. I never knew teenager girls could shut up.

Dear Customer Service Department

Hello Bank,

I've been a your customer for years. I used to think you guys were great. Now I've had trouble balancing my checkbooks because a few cents here and there keep missing. It is very annoying to suddenly adjust my checkbook balance for no particular reason.

However, you now have a new behavior that is even worse. If my ATM/Debit card is going to expire at the end of February could you be nice enough to mail a replacement card to me before it expires? It is very awkward to attempt purchasing groceries with an expired ATM/Debit card. I'm happy I had a credit card with me or else I couldn't purchase my food. A can of cocunut milk was critical for the Thai peanut sauce, chicken and noodles I was cooking.

Thanks,
Debt-Ridden Customer

Serendipity

Look!!!! Blogger and my internet connection ARE BOTH WORKING!!! I better post something quick before it goes to hell again. Since I have no time to post the ideas I want to talk about I'll post something quick and inane.

Things that make me happy. In my mailbox I have new issues of MotorTrend, Popular Mechanics, and Backpacker. Lots of new reading material for when I'm supervising students.

Is That Internet Thing Still On?

I admit it. I am completely addicted to the internet. I can surf the web all day doing research on whatever topic is on my mind at the time. I can let my mind float in the virtual ocean of knowledge the world wide web is. See I don't surf simply to fill up my hard drive full of pics of women.

Anyway the past few days I've been connected for 3 minutes at a time (if that long). After rebooting the router, rebooting the PC, running the self-diagnostics I'm always about ready to call up Ma Bell and then the internet stays connected . . . for about 3 minutes. Since I haven't been home much the past few days I haven't bothered to call Ma Bell.

I'm convinced I can sue SBC for intentional infliction of emotional distress. DO NOT TAKE AWAY ME ONLY CONNECTION TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD!!!

So far I'm at T-plus 17 minutes. I hope my connection stays happy.

Who Around Here Likes Apple?

You Are Apple Pie

You're the perfect combo of comforting and traditional Those who like you crave security

What Kind of Pie Are You?

The Blahs.

I have a serious case of 'the blahs' and it annoys me to no end.

That is all.

Friday Quotes

Since they are so short I'll give you two quotes.

Major John Shepard: "Scored a hit! That's either going to buy us time or piss them off. "

Commander Susan Ivanova: "With all due respect that was Grade A stupid."

CAS 2006: The World Is Fit For Honda.

Welcome to the world of microcars. A sub-subcompact if you will. Around the rest of the world these are the most common cars on the road. Although with growth inflation they are still a decent size now compared to the gerbil in a flywheeled powered versions of the past. Only to our American SUV-inflated eyes do these microcars seem really small.

After Katrina and Rita caused gas prices to spike up to over $3/gallon many consumers started to wonder about the cost of their overcapable/underutilized modes of transportation. Most people simply don't need V8 powered SUVs. They never tow anything and don't go more offroad then Aunt Lisa's gravel driveway or tailgating next to the intramural softball fields. [Don't translate that statement to believe I'm a SUV-hater. I'm all for people buying what they want. I only wish people gave more thought into what they actually need. Automobiles are a emotional purchase to an extent, but why waste hard earned money on capabilities you know you'll never use? For many people a mid-sized sedan makes far more sense, costs less to purchase and operate, and gets superior mileage.] The foreign automakers sense this change in automotive tastes and are bringing over their offerings. This year GM is bringing over their Korean redesigned Aveo. The Big 3 from Japan are bringing over the Toyota Yaris, Nissan Versa, and the above pictured Honda Fit.

Several items are key to these subcompacts: initial purchase price, operating costs (re: gas mileage), and functional flexibility. The automakers realize consumers are more savvy than in decades past. If the econobox feels like a penalty box it won't sell well no matter how modest the sales goals are. If Honda, Toyota, and Nissan want to sell 30 to 50,000 microcars apiece they need to be inexpensive and good quality, not cheap and crappy. Based on posts I've read, pictures I've seen, and my admittedly limited seat time in some of these cars I think Honda's Fit is the best candidate out there right now. If I had the money I would give the Fit some serious thought about purchasing it. That's how impressed I am with it.

I stepped into the Fit at Chicago because some doofus refused to get out of the Civic he was napping in. The two box design (one box = engine, one box = passenger compartment with no trunk) makes great use of the short overall length. The Fit is bigger on the inside than on the outside if you will. The Fit is very tall as well. Plenty of headroom to allow the illusion of space. The rear seat room is a bit tight, but not unreasonably so. A short jaunt across town should be fine for average height people.

The seating is the key to the Fit. Honda calls it "Magic Seats" and they do perform good tricks. The rear seats can go flat. They can roll up forward. The front seats can be laid completely backwards so you get a bed and lay down. With seating that flexible I suspect you can get some very unwieldly cargo into the car and still close the hatch.

The Fit is a small car so it uses a small engine: a 1.5 liter 109 horsepower version to be exact. Toyota and Chevy will use similar output engines, while the Nissan Versa will be the hotrod of this group at around 130 horsepower or so. Given the Fit's light weight and efficient attitude the acceleration should be adequate, but not exhilarating. This is an economy car, not a pocket rocket. With what appears to be standard antilock brakes, front and side airbags, and cruise control if you get the Fit Sport you get a lot of features for your 12 to 15 thousand dollars.

Available in the spring of this year if you're interested.

[EDIT] A link to Honda's American website concerning the Fit for those interested.

How Nerdy Are You?

I don't know. I can be pretty nerdy, but I do have some social skills. Perhaps the results are because I can hide some of that nerdiness. Ummmm..

CAS 07 Golf Is 3 Years Late

This is the third year this version of the Golf has been available in Europe. NOW it is finally coming to North America. Why the delay? I haven't a clue. VW could have used the new product to keep people coming into the showrooms. Granted the Jetta and Passat are bigger sellers than the Golf, but hey you always need new product coming in.

Anyway this Golf is just like the new Jetta introduced last year, except 15 inches shorter due to the hatchback styling. I liked the new Jetta. If you don't need the trunk the new Golf should be just as good. It might even handle better due to the shorter length and less weight. Parking will be a bit easier thanks to the lack of trunk. The interior simply felt right.

Oh yeah, the stereo does go up to 11. Stupid kids jacking around with the radio. I'll admit the sound was pretty clear at such a high volume. I'm guessing the MSRP will be similar to the Golf so expect a starting price of $18,000 or so. If you want something smaller and fuel efficient with some luxury it might be worth it.