The Measure Of A CHAMPION.

CHAMPIONS strive to be more than what they are. CHAMPIONS fight to be just. CHAMPIONS are strong to protect those that are not. CHAMPIONS stand up against the tyranny. CHAMPIONS do not follow the convenient or easy way simply because it is the convenient or easy way. CHAMPIONS follow the hard road, when it is the only way to go. CHAMPIONS bear the burdens no one else can. CHAMPIONS go it alone when no one else believes them. CHAMPIONS take the hits no one else will. CHAMPIONS strike when no one else can. CHAMPIONS are the steel, when the rest are straw. When CHAMPIONS fall, they go down swinging.

CHAMPIONS are not supposed to pass out after lunch! I felt the nausea after the meal. I closed my eyes. The next thing I remember was opening my eyes and everyone was looking at me while I was in a headlock. For about four minutes I was out, attempting to curl up, and appeared to others experienced a seizure. During my mental reboot I could answer questions in a yeah or no fashion, but my eyes didn’t focus on anything. It was weird when my mind passed some invisible threshold and suddenly I was back. It was like waking up in the middle of a flight and at first you forgot you were flying on a plane. You’re just confused for a few seconds because you’re not where you expect to be. The paramedics had already been called and arrived a few minutes after I regained full consciousness. They asked questions about my name (I so wanted to say Batman but figured that was a BAD idea), address, what year it was (sometimes I still have to resist writing 2003 on my checks so this was a tricky one), who the president was (my answer: Dub’ya. Paramedic’s response: eh, close enough), etc. I had to wait the split second before answering because the mental gears had to double check (perform checksum routine).

I walked out to the ambulance and rode in the back. Ambulances do not have a plush, with a comfortable ride attitude. The buckboard ride over the potholes made me even more nauseous; like 6 gin and tonics nauseous. When the paramedic gave me oxygen I had to wonder where I could a home version for after a night in Broad Ripple. I felt sorry for all the other people in the E.R. One guy puking, one women withdrawing from narcotics, another women bleeding because her boyfriend beat the snot out of her, and I’m there on the gurney cracking jokes and burping every 5 minutes. I felt bad taking up the space. After 4 hours, 1 EKG to see if my heart was fine, and 1 cat-scan to see if my graduate-senile brain was fine: the results were that I was fine! Except for my extreme embarrassment, the bruised ego, the upset stomach, and the fact that parts of my chest were shaved to allow better contact with the EKG pads I was perfectly fine. I may avoid the hamloaf in the future though. I can’t even blame this on Guinness and green beer.

What a week. I accidentally wreck my own taillights, I don’t get my dream job, and now I pass out and go to the E.R. Yet through the trials and tribulations that life throws at us all, CHAMPIONS continue on. Am I the next champion or am I simply too stubborn to give up?